wazika.net

Someone come over and make me some coffee.  That would be good. No make me a latte or some fancy pants drink, that would be even nicer.    Last night I went to Music on the Square with Laima.  They had an opera singer or two there and I wanted to go and hear how that would sound, outside in that area…it sounded great.  They also played one of my favorite classical peices for the second half.  Awesome.   Wow, that place has changed in four years.  Now the streets are filled with camping chairs and I swear there were more people there than  I have ever seen.

Eh. Losing interest in this post. I am going to go and make my own boring coffee, and work some more on a barrette and watch some more morning videos on VH1  and MTV.

Oh great despair! I have failed. Rather, I am going to fail so I might as well enjoy the pity and self worthlessness that it can bring in right now. What is wrong with me? Last week I was brim full of energy, ambition and entrepreneurship. Today I sit here, congratulating myself on taking a shower and a trip to the post office as work well done. Bah. I did spend some time working on the second barrette too, but that is part the dismay at my utter insignificance. I can’t make crafts, what a stupid notion. They never sell well and I don’t have the first clue on how to do it. Sure there is the library, but that would mean I would have inclination to even find out what books I should be looking at. The writing thing? I have this deadline for August first for the story I have been working on this month (now draft three) and it sits here open on my desktop. I try to write something, succeed in hammering out a sentence and changing a word here or there but it hasn’t grown an inch. I feel like I have already written the story a thousand times in my head, seen all the great ending and envisioned great adventures. Why should I write it down? It’s just going to be boring, hackish amateur attempt at scribbling. At least I claim I never wanted to be a poet. Proclaiming “A writer” at least implies that I have grandiose romantic notions about the world and myself. Grandiose is about the only thing that is correct.

I just don’t know where all my zip went.  What do I want to be happy? I want to not have to take money from our savings to pay bills like we had to do this month.  I want Tim to be happy with a job (I think I want that more than anything). I want a juicy little job.  I was even tossing around the idea of biting the bullet and going back to school.  Ugh…school.  Another job, but I am supposed to be able to get another better job after that.  It would all depend if I could finance the whole thing without taking out debt.  What do I want? I want more than anything to leave this place and start an adventure in another world.

I wish we had more food too.  I think I am going to make a rhubarb pie, you can do that without eggs, milk or bread you know.  ;P

Okay, I am so up with this week. I updated Weekend in Pictures…have a look. It will show photographic evidence that I went to Phil and earrings going away party this weekend at Token Creek and was stunned to find out that they had gotten married last December! Holy congratulations, Batman. They made the best brats, and I found myself wishing I could have another one all day yesterday. Suck. We stayed for about three hours and played a game of horseshoes (I won), visited with Jerry, Mike, Rachel and Beth, Phil and Erin but tiredness prevented us from really chatting with everyone. Bah. I hate that when I am provided with an excellent social opportunity and fail…lackluster guest. Suck. We had to go home to let the dogs out anyway, and to see if Brandi called. We offered to have them over for a grill out that afternoon but there had been some miscommunication so we weren’t entirely sure if it was still on.

We got home and it was still on, and after awhile Brandi came over with a guest, their daughter, Sophie and Hannah and Henry. It was great! We fired up the grill, relaxed, the kids ran around and screamed their heads off (nice to do everyone once in awhile), caught lightening bugs, ate, and played with lame house frisbees.

After they left and I hung up the newest art in our living room (Brandi brought it over) and admired it, we decided it was too late to hook back up with Phil and Erin and stayed in. I read and Tim played a Mech game that someone gave him.

Sunday we slept in. I made some bad corn fritter type pancakes (I don’t get it…I like corn and I like Pancakes…why didn’t this work???), walked to the St. Dennis Festival up the street — my first time ever to an event like this — Tim yawned and said it was like an old shoe. Those ministers kids…so worldly. We bought some corn, had a beer and played a lotto type ticket before we left. We walked to Woodmans to buy some smokes, cereal, crystal light and apples. I wish I had remembered soy milk…   Oh, and then we went over to Brandi’s to look at some furniture that she had….we wanted it…but our car was too small. Then she did something extraordinary…she said we could use her PT Cruiser to bring the desk and dresser back to our place!  Oh that was absolutely awesome, at is so nice, and finally I feel like we are starting to get some nice furniture.   

What’s up with the mail?? I don’t think we have gotten mail for the past three days. Yesterday we put some mail out and by 2:00 it wasn’t gone. When we came back it was gone….but Tim of course said “Maybe it was stolen.” Since there wasn’t any mail in return…not even the stupid Shopper Stopper that we get EVERY Saturday….I started to fear. Actually, still am. Maybe someone DID take our mail…but why? It was a Netflix, two surveys, and two letters…I guess I will know about the Netflix by today or tomorrow… if they did take our mail. But…dude. I suspect there is a new mail person or something and they aren’t doing quite the best job.

Look at all the things I can do. I can startle you by saying something like…. I walked into the kitchen, and to my disgust saw that the poop sat in a pool of blood. Ha. Impressed aren’t you?

Last night I watched Under the Tuscan Sun. I had found the book a year or two earlier on the concrete slab at our Chicago apartment for free and tried to read it. Ugh. I couldn’t stand it, the premise was just too much for me. Well-t0-do professor type pays one million to buy a house in Tuscany, is she crazy? No, she just fucking rich and I don’t care to hear about her obeserve the little details of Italian life under a one million dollar home in another country. So, I thought I would watch the movie knowing it might be better. It was, but not by much. It disturbed me that spent all her money buying the house (making sure not to show the audience how much) and yet had enough money for elaborate dinners and crap. Bah. But it was something to do while Tim toiled away at work until late hours of the day.

Jake is pain in the ass. A dog. He is way too interested in the cats and last night he was going after one…two of them. If it was to sniff them, fine..but he was going to fast and scared them. Migo swatted him, he yelped but then I got scared when he kept going after Migo. I threw him outside and checked the paper we had gotten regarding him. Of course the one thing I need to punish him was the one thing that the owner forget to give us. A nose muzzle (because if at all possible…Jake should not be confined). Eventually I let him back in (had to…Pluto was a dumbass and went out side with him), put him on a lease and made him sit on the couch with me. Sigh. Today he discovered Koopa, and even though I have her ruby palace sheathed in a cotton, he still sits and stares, and whines. If this is what a normal dog is like, then I don’t want one. I want all dogs to be like Pluto. Don’t bark, don’t show interest or go after cats or other small marsupials, sleep a lot, and … well… is quiet.

gah!   This is so  very frusturating.  Comments and archiving aren’t working yet…and for the longest time I couldn’t even get the damn post to show, although it was updating on the previously posted side. I am sure you don’t care…but I need a break otherwise this is going to break me.

The archiving and blah blah blah links aren’t diminishing, even though I changed the settings.  Do I need to make an other meaningless post?

Checking to see if I can post via email.

----------------------------->www.wazika.net