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Things I have accomplished today:

–Taking a shower. This is huge, folks. Huge.
–Getting Morella dressed.
–Getting Athena dressed.
–Going to the park and playing with Morella
–Picking apples from “Apple Guy” yard/tree. Morella LOVES this.
–Buying apples from another house a block up…two big bags for a buck.
–I wish I had an apple tree of my own.
–Giving Morella lunch while Athena howls.
–Getting Athena to take a nap the same time as Morella
–Enjoying duo naps and catching up on the internet! Oh man it’s nice.
–Paid the mortgage.
–Paid the cell phones.
–Wrote a few cards and birth announcements.
–Washed and dried a load of laundry.
–Going the the massive clothes disarray in Morella room. Switching seasons is hard when kids outgrew things so fast and you have to sort through the smaller to bigger stuff she is going to grow into over the fall and winter.
–Made tuna fish sandwiches for myself.
–Made the bed.
–Read my email.
–Hammered out Playgroup events for October.

The day is not done…

Athena has been crying most of this evening as she did last night — I think it’s because I had ice cream. Sigh. I hope that she is feeling better soon and it’s gone by tomorrow night. She is arching her back, urpy — all the reflux signs. Poor kid. Poor me. Poor my back.

Very blustery today. Regardless I took Morella and Athena to the park where she and Noah were the only two left (not hard when only four kids showed up … and lots of others skipped the park altogether). She loved the wind howling through her air as she swung on the swings. Maybe she is Tim’s kid after all — has a bit of the ice running through her veins. But you know, I used to love winter too. I think when I broke my back the ice that I had trickled out.

Athena is crying again. I had only five minutes respite there.

SO it doesn’t look like I am going to be visiting my Mom this weekend. Rachel was right — they don’t want little children in the Intensive Care Unit. They don’t have a specific rule but if we had brought them in it would have had to been for a super short visit 5-10 minutes and we would have had to hold them the entire time and not touch anything. If she was in her own room it would be a slightly different story — but so far she is not. This morning she was having a invasive test performed to see if she has any gallstones that is causing her liver and kidneys to fail (even though she doesn’t have a gallbladder anymore). Our revised plan had been to call this afternoon at 3:00 to see if she would be moved to a room tomorrow (Sunday). Then we were going to still break up the drive and go this late afternoon.

That’s all fubared because Morella was up until 9:30 last night and then woke up crying this morning at 6:00 complete with a faucet nose. I tried putting her down at 10 but she howled and then I fed her lunch and put her down about 20 minutes ago and as we speak she is saying “Down! Down!” in her room. She almost feel asleep at the table over lunch! What the heck is going on?

So since she is sick she has a lowered immunity system and … well travelling with a sick toddler is one of my worst nightmares. It just sucks that Athena is going to get it. She had just gotten over that two week stuffy nose.

GO TO SLEEP MORELLA! You are sick! You need to sleep!

Her being sick scrapped the Greyhound Gala plans this morning too. She was going to go with Tim and I was going to get to spend the morning with Athena. Seeing as Athena has slept almost the entire morning and was good when she was awake it would have been like a freaking vacation. But no. The best laid plans…or even plans kind of made at the last minute ….

It’s the first time we are missing the gala since we moved to Madison six years ago. Bummer. It would have been nice if we all could have gone but our car won’t hold all of us and the dog.

For lunch I made Morella a cheese pizza on a pan to make the crust softer. I ended up eating 3/4 of the darn thing. It wasn’t filling at all (I also didn’t have breakfast and was famished). I quit at that point and ate some leftover meatloaf which DID fill me up. Maybe because it was just cheese with no good toppings that made it so insubstantial.

Yesterday was a good day despite it being grey and gloomy. I wasn’t quick enough to get out the door for a music lesson, in part because Athena was on day two of eat eat eat eat eat … oh and more eating. So I decided to walk the kids to the library and spend some time there. Morella is in a looking at books phase again, so I thought it would be nice. Plus we ran out of caffeinated coffee and I wanted to get some at Java cat, which is a block away from the library. We got some books, ate some lunch, picked some apples off this guys lawn (I asked him about it last year — he said he doesn’t use pesticides and to help ourselves). One of the apples ended up with Morella who nom nomed it all the way home. It had just rained all morning so I am sure the apple was fine. There was a “band” (two people with … uh… musical talent…) playing music at the coffee house which Morella enjoyed, so I gave her a buck to put in the tip jar. As she was doing that they thanked her and said they also do parties. Ha ha ha. Um…no.

I brought my camera…so here are some photos from the day.

I had her wear the blue fancy “princess” dress her step grandmother had made her for Xmas. It’s the kind of thing that I figured didn’t really need a great excuse for her to wear other than a trip to the library. She made several other little girls jealous and they wanted to be a princess too. Ha ha. She destroyed it with apple juice from the apple by the time we got home. I’m sure it will wash out…right?

I set an automatic timer and took this photo of us. Morella is making her scrunched up face when she thinks something is really funny or clever.

By the way she is still crying. She has five more minutes to go until I get her out. I have no idea what to do with her after that.

A comment from Kathleen reminded me that I didn’t need to go Happy Bambino to spend 75-85 dollars on sling when I could just modify the moby to do the same thing. So I set it up and voila! Worked like a charm. It was great! I love how versatile the moby can be.

I has saved the pregnancy test that tested positive for Athena — in part as a reminder over the pregnancy that I was really pregnant (despite the big belly), and also to remember that day and how shocked I was … anyway. I thought it was time to get rid of the stick and remembered the advice of “take a picture of it” if you are keeping it for the memory. Athena was there and so I took a picture of the stick and her as sort of a “full circle” photo. That stick meant this little girl was on her way. So no, I am not pregnant again. You can breath now.

One last look at my adorable, cute and cuddly vaguely ethnic baby.

Now I have to go and rescue Morella…I can’t take her for a walk because as soon as I do Athena is going to want to be fed. Sigh.

Athena has been nursing non stop all evening. It’s incredible. I actually feel sore and don’t think it’s thrush. I fully expect her to double in size overnight. It also explains why I am so hungry.

A few things while she lets me — I tried to just put her down because she had fallen asleep but I think she might fuss in a minute. I can just type so much faster with two hands than one.

Morella loves baths now and didn’t want to get out of hers tonight. I actually had to do the age old “pull the plug” trick and let the water drain out. Once she realized the water was gone she started scrubbing herself with the wash clothes. Sheesh. I pulled her out and let her do some naked time before getting her into pajamas. Then we commenced the rest of our Thursday ritual of single parenting in which I let her stay up until 8 because we watch Bones and snuggle. She is SO good during this time. I think she knows she gets to stay up late and is mellow and good natured and it’s almost a shame when I do put her down to bed.

One of Morella’s cute things is hiding something behind her back and then asking me “Where’d it go?” and then showing it to me a few seconds later. “There it is!” Ha ha. Oh man. I think she really thinks she has one on me by making it disappear.

Athena has been giving out more smiles and is starting to be awake longer in stretches during the day. She went to bed last night at 9 — it doesn’t look like that is happening tonight though. Oh. Tonight while I was letting Pluto out and carrying her against my chest, her head slipped a bit and she started to latch onto my neck. It was funny because Tim likes to call her a milk vampire and here she was, acting like a real vampire and trying to suck my neck! No but really, tonight this milk bandit is in full form. Oh and look that. She is falling asleep. That’s nice. I have to change her diaper.

Cloth diapering her is awesome. She was blowing through every single disposable whenever she pooped — all the way up her back, or her front. It was disgusting. But the cloth diapers contain it…every drop. It’s amazing. I think it’s because they absorb the liquid faster than the paper ones. Whatever it is, it’s amazing. I still use a disposable at night for her because she rarely poops just pees alot and they seem to hold more pee comfortably than cloth.

Cloth diapering Morella has become a challenge. She has a rash on her inner thigh that has been plaguing her all summer because of chaffing from the diapers because they sag once they become wet. No matter how vigilant I am her diapers become so soaked with pee that I would have to know the instant it happened to avoid any saggy diaper syndrome and that just isn’t going to happen. I have tried. I tried a contoured diaper called Tiny Tush but even with doublers she is leaking out of them pretty bad (enough to have to change pants). I got six of them so I am sort of disappointed about this turn of events. Maybe she just needs two microfiber inserts…I am not ready to give up yet. It’s just that they aren’t at match for her deluge of pee. I also splurged and got one of those fancy all in ones – twiddlewinks I think. It’s awesome. Oh so very awesome. I love it and can totally see how people would spend oodles of money on diapers. Sigh. I just have to hang in there. Soon it will be pants and onesie under all clothes weather which should help until she can be potty trained.

My Mom was transferred to Sacred Heart in Eau Claire. We are going to go and visit her this weekend, spending the night in Eau Claire. They are still running tests, but there is something very wrong with her liver and her heart. Both liver and heart specialists have been called into to give their professional opinion which we will hopefully hear tomorrow. I am not sure if young children are allowed in the intensive care unit so I am sort of hoping she’ll get transferred to a room. She said that she has been feeling much better because of the breathing treatments she has been getting. Now I need to find someone to watch Pluto and book a hotel that has cribs in Eau Claire. I guess I could be doing that right now.

[just looked ... gonna need more time on that .... maybe Tim should just do it]

So I had a granola bar like a 1/2 an hour ago and I am still hungry. Sigh. I have refrained from a lot of obvious dairy and Athena is back to her old self. I had heavy cream the other day in my soup and she spit up and screamed the next day …. I think that there is a connection though her intolerance is obviously not as bad as Morella’s was/is. I wonder if we should do another milk trail with her. It would sure as heck be a lot cheaper and easier than having to buy 8th Continent Vanilla Soy, especially since she is drinking so much of the stuff lately. She’s obviously going through something because her mouth and head seem to be hurting. I wonder if she had headaches. I wonder if they are two year molars.

Gah, wearing silk pajamas with a laptop on you is one recipe for being over heated. Well the laptop is going to die in a few minutes (battery) so I should sign off. Here are some more photos:

Noah – one of Morella’s BFF’s.

I found her in the kitchen like this back when Tim was on paternity leave. Little stinker.

Burping the baby.

My brother called me this morning to say that Mom was taken to the hospital last night because of vomiting and severe chest pain. He also mentioned something about kidneys and liver failing as well and gave me the phone number to call her. I did, she was very out of breath and said the pain in her chest is still there and the doctor told her to see a specialist. She wasn’t really able to say much more and the nurses came in for more medication. Sigh.

I don’t now. Shane said things aren’t looking too good for her and I hate it when he says that. You know? So know I am thinking of how I am going to take two kids up to see her. I can’t not leave them in what might be their last chance to see her on the other hand I don’t need them to be there the whole time. And I’ll need help. I think I could call upon some old friends that are there to see if the would have time to help. I just don’t know. I am probably jumping the gun. But you know she was in the hospital just last week for five days for low potassium and I have just seen too many cases where when things start to fail so close to each other then it all goes downhill quickly.

Oh I just don’t know. It’s a wait and see right now.

Meanwhile I have a doctors appointment this morning for my post partum check. I was going to take both with me but now decided that isn’t a good idea. So I am going to drop Morella off at Ann’s in a little bit and just take Athena. 11:30 is a crappy time for an appointment. Sigh.

Also, Tim misplaced all my nursing bra’s the last time he did the laundry. I have no idea where they are.

Athena – 3 weeks

Before the carousel ride — she was VERY concerned that she wouldn’t get to have a ride on it.

On the ride. Thankfully, she is happy with one ride, and she rides it with the utmost seriousness.

Two or three weeks…

“No, no, no, no, no ….. ” Morella scolds Leo for touching her dollhouse.

Quick! Post while Morella is distracted by Seasame Street, and Athena snoozes off her long night. Thoughts on my mind right now:

–I wish I could drink more coffee in the morning — was that thai iced tea that kept Athena up so late last night?

–Is the thrush acting up again? I felt a few stabs in my left breast yesterday and the nipples on both feel a bit dryed out and tender. Is that because of thrush or because Athena has been eating a lot? Also, that white coating in the back of her tongue is that thrush or just milk tongue? I doesn’t look like the thick white coating she had when she really did have thrush, but maybe it’s just the beginning? But it hasn’t changed in the last three days so I should quite worrying about it already.

–I have the six week follow up doctor appointment on Wedneday at 11:30. I have NO idea how I can keep that appointment with two young kids, at lunch time. I should really cancel and reschedule but I that would require work.

–I want my stamps to come in so I can send out more mail.

–I have to play the gas and electric bill today.

–Playgroup is this morning at 9:30 and then Toddler Time at the library starts up again at 10:30 today. Should I try and make both? I just don’t know. It’s all grey and gloomy out. I am tried. My hair is all greasy so soon after that Saturday shower — I don’t know what to wear because all of my clothes are in storage and the leftover maternity stuff looks like stretched out old clothes on me.

–Put baby powder in my hair to hide the state it’s in.

–Get the kids dressed and ready for leaving the house. (Hm, I guess I decided to go ahead and do that).

–Stephanie brought over browies last night and chili. She included a small baggie of pasta O’s. I asked Tim was that was for and he said “Some people are still under the impression that chili must include pasta.” To which I replied “Chili with pasta is called goulash!” (And age old pet peeve of mine).

–Anyway, those brownies were so good and I had to eat a big one. I tried to keep it real with a small piece, but it just kept on in my head. I even ate a stupid apple, drank a cup of tea, drank water, delayed etc…and finally just had to give in. It was really good and craving was satisfied afterward.

–Really, I want more coffee than these two cups that equal one cup. I can’t help but to think about women in the old days. They didn’t drink coffee and would have been up a lot sooner than I was this morning working. Their kids would have a wooden spoon to play with, a handful of rocks and … I don’t know what else. They wouldn’t get specialized attention. They would just follow their Mom around as she did all kinds of manual, mind numbingly borning labor such as washing clothes and diapers, making bread,

n Ugh morella is here.

Morella and her BFF Leta watching her second movie ever…she lasted about 15-20 minutes before losing interest…but they were a jam packed, nail biting 20 minutes.

“Momma’s gonna sing you lullaby…”

Things are good. Once again it is Thursday night and I haven’t posted since Monday. How does that happen? How is it that the weeks are going by so fast? I guess that is what happens when the days are so richly filled (whining, crying and tantrums included). sINCE i AM YET AGAIN PECKIN THIS ENTRY OUT WITH A NEWBORN…OH nuts. I am not going back to fix that.

So pecking = tidbits.

• Athena has had a stuffy, congested nose for two week now
• She smiled at me for the first time on Tuesday.
• First tears showed up today—the waterworks have started!
• Morella actually got some air in a jump! Also likes to spin to get dizzy, play “go!” in which she yells go and everyone runs.
• Visited Hilary yesterday and after some warm up time with Cullen eventually played with him quite a bit by quitting time. She also loves Leta. She was sitting next to her on the couch watching a movie “Cats and Dogs” — her second movie ever and she was a huge chatterbox, sitting on the edge of her seat, big expressions … it was SO cute!
• I went to the dentist today with Athena and got my teeth cleaned and stage one of a crown put in. I was also going to get a new mouth guard but they wanted $550 for it. I mean, that cost more than the crown! Ugh. The lab tech said to try the store solutions first. I think I’ll just do that. I wish I wasn’t a grinder. It sucks that I grind — and its the reason for the crown right. I would have held it off another three years or whatever except my tooth started hurting after having Athena.
• Playgroup at Tenny Park today. One of the tots was violently..no strongly? pushed off one of the playground equipment causing the toddler to fall into the chain. Her Mom caught her before she hit the ground and took her away to calm her down. Now a normal person would scold, or talk to the parent of the pusher right? In this case the person was a tween with Down’s Syndrome, and her helper seemed like a teenager. What do you say? I mean the DS girl obviously knew she shouldn’t have done that because she was saying “no hitting” after it (and then five minutes later pushed another toddler over). I’ve been trying to think of the proper response to the whole event and I can’t come up with a solid answer. What we did do was remove ourselves from the situation and go to another park. Hopefully the kids are young enough to hopefully not connect the dots on why we left.
• Morella waded in water today off a beach on her own accord!
• I went out last night with a friend for a couple of hours for some adult conversation. I took Athena and she was pretty good for the most part. It was SO nice to get out. I also scrapped this stupid low yeast diet because it’s stressing me out more than anything and I don’t notice any change and in fact, since I stopped last night I seem to be better ( as in no symptoms, imagined or not).
• I am really into Bones right now and got Season 1 disc on Netflix. I am now going to work my way through them.
• We watched the second season of True Blood this week and it was good. “Heart sick and eyes filled up with gloom….”
• Birth announcements are coming along…I actually manged to finish about 30 of them today and can start sending them out. I need more stamps. I should just order that online because going to the post office with both of these kids is too much of a hassle.
• My Mom was in the hospital again this past week into the weekend because of low potassium from too many water pills, and starvation…if you will believe it. Sigh. I hope she can keep it together for a while longer. I at least want her to meet Athena at Thanksgiving. Sometimes I wish I lived closer so that I could go over and help her out more and visit and cheer her up. Even if it was only a 1/2 an hour a day or whatever. I talked to her tonight and she is doing much better.

Athena is crying. Dang it. I really wanted to finish my tea and this post. Oh Tim just took her. Well I can at least finish my tea and call it quits on this post and get ready for bed.