A time for change

Today is Tim’s last day at his current job. It’s been a tumultuous past couple of weeks in coming to a decision regarding this job. I’ll be upfront and honest and say that I am not entirely excited about the prospect of this job based solely on how it affects me. I am happy for Tim in that he has a new opportunity and will hopefully find happiness and finally, a little job satisfaction in this new job. However, this new job is on the other side of town in Verona which means Tim’s commute is twice as long and we will have to buy a new car to go along with this job. But I think the biggest reason for not liking it is that we are going to be losing our superb insurance with GHC. Before he started at his current place, I was pretty ambivalent about doctors, health insurance and what have you. I only cared about how much we paid each month to be a part of a plan that I never really participated in. However, with the infertility treatment, two pregnancies, labor and delivery, and two kids (one of which had a hospitalization) — ambivalence about health care is the last thing on my mind. Over the past four years I have developed a relationship with the medical industry, with my doctor and the kids pediatricians, and the Urgent Care staff. I have grown used to paying next to nothing for these services and have taken advantage of them, but that is all about to change. We will go from paying $107 bucks a month for peace of mind, and the occasional $10 co pay, or $5 generic prescription to $30 co pays and tiered prescription costs — the lowest of which is $20 bucks. Oh and lets not forget that we have to pay 10% of whatever we go to the doctor for, on top of that stupid copay, then there are deductibles and …. we will have to pay $400 a month for the privilege of being a part of this wretched plan. Thinking of this just makes me sick. At times like this, I really hate america’s health care plans.

With the high cost of this “health plan” and the purchase of a new car, plus mileage and car costs, we will not actually be making any extra money in this job move of his. At best it will be a lateral move. Aside from the Tim’s potential happiness (which is big, I agree .. but at this point is still a total unknown) I don’t see how any of this is going to benefit me at all. What’s that you say? I get a new car? A Mazda 5? I don’t care. I’m happy with our fully paid for car. The only bright spot I have at this moment is that Tim is going to be taking a month off between his current job and his next job.

But you know, it isn’t by choice. He decided to give his current job at month’s notice — to finish up projects, help with transition and generally help them out because they need it. They on the other hand decided “We don’t like long good byes” and so a month’s notice became five days. A rather unexpected turn of events if you ask me. So our insurance ends at the end of this month, and we had to use our FSA before the end of this month and we will have to buy a month of COBRA for June.

Anyway. A month. It starts tomorrow. I have been trying to just focus on this month. The one thing that is making this whole situation seem better.

I am just not handling this change very well. I can’t help but to feel that I am unhappy for nothing because this is the standard by which most of America lives. Long commutes, shitty health care plans, two car environments, blah blah blah. I know I will get used to it — because I have too.

In other news, Morella has had a rotovirus all week. It’s been pretty wretched cleaning poopy panties, pants, and wrangling a super sensitive, crabby, sometimes pukey kid, and a baby. Oh man, there was one point the other day we had come back from the park, and were standing in the bathroom. Morella was about to throw up and I could tell, but I couldn’t do anything about it because I was holding Athena. She threw up all over the bathroom floor. Thick, milky vomit falling to the floor in heavy waves. I let her finish and then wiped her face with the wet washcloth in my hand (I had been giving Neener’s a quick towel bath). I put Athena on the floor in the hallway and quickly started to clean up the vomit — but not fast enough because Neeners crawled under me, slipped on the wet surface and smeared puke all over herself! Oh man. It was one of those moments you just want to freeze in time and savor. :P

Wednesday we went to our regular Wednesday outside playdate. She seemed okay, just sensitive and tired, but then puked afterward. Thursday I thought for sure she was better — nope — we made it to the Spring Potluck outside where she crapped her pants and I think was hallucinating (she saw a fox on an empty hill, and a little kid house in a wide empty field). To today where we dropped Tim off at work so that he could enjoy a few after work beers with his soon to be ex-coworkers. He didn’t ride bike because he had to bring the work laptop with him to return. I stopped at an estate sale on the way home and had to carry both kids, though she had warmed up to it by the end. It’s fun looking inside other people’s houses! If I were rich and had the know how, that would have been awesome house to take on and fix up.

After we got back, I put Athena down for a nap — which she has been doing for the last two hours! Morella has turned into a TV junkie this week because of the illness that will not go away. By junkie, what I really mean to say is a Max and Ruby junkie. She just wants to watch endless episodes of Max and Ruby.

Throughout it all, I’ve been remarkably okay. I think having summer like weather really helps. I went on Wednesday night with my friend Ann. I rode bike with her to a local bar – Mickey’s and had three…count em…. three drinks over the course of the evening. I got home late at 12:30 — and paid for it the next day. Ugh. But my friend Lowen came over for a visit yesterday afternoon and brought some chex mix. I made us some awesome espresso and we took the kids on a walk in the neighborhood where Morella feel asleep in the stroller (that never happens anymore) and of course Neeners demanded to be carried. Then Emily and Leo came over for a short visit on … Wednesday afternoon? It’s hard to be depressed when you can just go outside.

Hey I got cleared (called Diggers Hotline) to start a garden in the patch of land next to the drive way that actually gets full sunlight. I’m pretty jazzed about that, and it’s one of our projects in the Tim Month. Geez, it needs it’s own name I think. I am going to plant tomatoes and sunflowers…maybe something else. Flowers I suppose since Morella loves them.

Now some pictures before the baby wakes up.

Classic shampoo head

Morella jumping on the bed

The only time in the last three months that Athena hasn’t wailed on the changing table. Never has a baby hated diaper changes more than Neeners.

Sad baby is sad.

I wish this wasn’t blurry. She has been sitting in the basket — got there on her own. It just seemed like such a classic shot.

Morella is playing with her new $600 dollar toy – the Ipad. She loves it, but can only play with under supervision. The touch screen is very child intuitive and there are a lot of applications that she enjoys.

I went to shopko yesterday for an eye exam (my eyes finally got worse to -4.50) where I got new glasses and contacts. I stopped by electronics and found myself a nyloprene case for the ipad — for only $14 bucks! Take that $45 dollar best buy cases! I also got myself a pair of sandals. Sandals are the type of thing that you know you like them upon wearing. It’s been three years since I have last found a pair that I really like. Woo! SO yeah, looking forward to new glasses.

3 thoughts on “A time for change

  1. Sleep late... dream more

    ALSO – are those the actual glasses you’re getting? Or is this a teaser photo? (are you really turning in to a “BAG” — someone who wears “Black Alternative Glasses” ??? ;)

  2. Rebekah

    I would be upset about the job change too. Yeah, you want your spouse to be happy, and it sounds like he’s getting more money–but with the higher costs you won’t see any of that. It sucks when a change for the better doesn’t feel like it. :(

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