Dear Pinstripe Pants,
When we first met, I was madly in love with you. I wanted to hang out with you all the time. You made me feel skinny, sexy, confident and cool. I guess all good things must come to an end right? I know it was risky going out with you, I knew that when I bought you there was chance that my life might change, however I was tired of living off of “what if” and “maybe” so I threw caution to wind and searched high and low for you before finally finding you at at JC Penny’s.
We have had good times together, you and I. I have gotten so many compliments by your mere presence that it was struggle not to want to wear you every day! Lately though, I have been feeling like our relationship has changed. I get it, you’re hip, you’re modern, you are medium low rise and aren’t gonna change your ways no matter what.
It’s hard to come out and say it, but I feel like you are constricting me. You aren’t giving me the room I need to grow, and your embrace is almost painful. It’s with regret that I suggest we take some time apart. You know? Take time to breath, and maybe even see other pants.
I think we should try to remain friends though, let’s give it some time and hook up in the new year. I wish you all the best.